These dud spuds make a great side dish at dinnertime on April Fools' day. After the joke's been sprung, kids can serve up the pretend potatoes at playtime.
For each potato, stuff an 8-inch section of nude-colored nylons with pillow batting (A).
Twist both ends and use a needle and thread to sew them to the bottom (B).
For each eye, push the threaded needle up from the bottom and out the top of the potato, then back through about 1/8 inch from where it came out (C). Pull the needle out the bottom and knot the thread to secure it. Before "serving," use scissors to cut a slit in the top and add a pat of craft foam butter.