This is a post about a failure, specifically MY failure to find my "Zen moment" in my very own home.
In my previous, pre-child life, I'd always really enjoyed yoga. Something about the combination of working out my muscles while relaxing my mind would make me feel fabulous. Of course, my days of attending hours-long yoga sessions are long over. With the three kids at home, I'm lucky to have twenty minutes to visit the grocery store alone!
So I tried to create some of that relaxation in my own home recently. My yearning for inner peace reached an all-time high on that particular day. Dealing with the always urgent needs of three children and a house that seemed to be cloning clutter left me completely frazzled. I had been particularly perturbed by some really confounding overnight patterns in James' blood sugar, so not only was I really stressed out but I was also exhausted! Still, I had the yoga mat, I had the water bottle, I had some minutes when the kids seemed to be happily entertaining themselves. I grabbed my moment (and my yoga video) and plopped down on the mat.
Within five minutes of starting the video, I attracted the attention of both James and Luke. I should have remembered that anything on the television is immediately appealing to them. Initial curiosity turned into a terrific manifestation of the two very different personalities of my oldest children.
James sauntered over to the table and made a sign with a marker that said, "Go Mom," and proceeded to act like a cheerleader as I tried to relax into the various poses. "Yay, Mom! Looking good! Keep going!" Sweet and supportive as it may have been, it didn't do much to foster my relaxation. Luke, on the other hand, started following along with the video on his own. Soon, he was doing a cute four-year-old version of "down dog" and "triangle pose," but he was doing it ON MY MAT and asking me (not too politely) to please move off of his spot (HIS spot??). Needless to say, I didn't finish the video, and I didn't feel that wonderful combination of inner peace and warm, tired muscles that yoga usually brings me!
So yes, on that particular day, although we succeeded at creating a funny family memory, I failed pretty spectacularly at finding some much-needed inner peace. But I haven't given up on my quest, and I hope I can write in a few months that I've figured out a way to create some time for relaxation and calm. I do have a plan -- one that I'll share with you, in hopes that by doing so my resolve will be that much stronger.
My new goal is to add yoga to my morning "bookend" routine. Since the house should be picked up, and the children should be sleeping, I might be able to carve out those minutes that I need more than ever as a mom of a child with type 1 diabetes. I'm not good at this yet, but with a few tweaks, I'm confident that I can bring the Zen back to our crazy lives!
About the author: My name is Jennifer, and I live in Southern California with my husband, Craig, and our three boys. Our oldest son James has been diagnosed with type 1 diabetes. I’m thankful for this opportunity -- along with my sister-in-law Kim and her daughter Kaitlyn, who also has type 1 diabetes -- to share our struggles and triumphs with our friends in the diabetes community.
Disclaimer: The experiences and suggestions recounted in these articles are not intended as medical advice, and they are not necessarily the "typical" experiences of families with a child who has type 1 diabetes. These situations are unique to the families depicted. Families should check with their healthcare professionals regarding the treatment of type 1 diabetes and the frequency of blood glucose monitoring. Jen and Kim are real moms of kids with type 1 diabetes and have been compensated for their contributions to this site.